How To Deal With Grief and Trauma

169 The Many Faces of Trauma | Betrayal Trauma: When Trust Becomes Unsafe

Nathalie Himmelrich Season 16 Episode 169

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Betrayal trauma can be uniquely disorienting because it not only breaks trust—it can disrupt your sense of reality and self-trust. In this episode, we explore betrayal trauma as a nervous system injury that often leads to hypervigilance, rumination, shutdown, and relationship fear. Using simple polyvagal-informed language, we look at why the body moves from connection to surveillance after betrayal and how healing often centres on truth, boundaries, and rebuilding trust in yourself. The episode ends with a short “Truth Anchor” practice to stabilise the present moment.

In this episode, you’ll learn

  • What betrayal trauma is and why dependency makes it more traumatic
  • How betrayal can create “reality doubt” and self-questioning
  • Polyvagal-informed patterns: mobilised protection vs shutdown after trust breaks
  • Common impacts on body, mind, and relationships (non-diagnostic)
  • What helps: clarity, boundaries as safety structures, and rebuilding self-trust
  • A short grounding practice to anchor reality and support regulation

Grounding practice (2–3 minutes): “Truth Anchor”

  • Name 3 present-moment facts
  • Use thumb-to-fingertip pressure as a physical anchor
  • Choose one truth sentence: “My feelings make sense,” “I’m allowed to protect myself,” etc.
  • Name one small next step

Related Episode:

Check the website for the free resources offered for both those affected by trauma and those supporting them.

What’s next: Single-Incident Trauma: When ‘Before’ and ‘After’ Split

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